” I let out a muffled cry as the tears slide down my cheeks. I wasn’t about to hold them back knowing that the one thing I wanted for Christmas was to wake up with Marc holding me. I let out a growl, I grab my wallet and head to the store. If I can’t have Marc here, I’m going to drink. I get to the store and grab a bottle Jack Daniels and go home. I don’t bother with having dinner that I had planned to make for us when Marc got home. I flop onto the couch and flick on the TV. Of course there is not a damn thing on that isn’t Christmas related and decide to watch ‘A Christmas Story’. I start drinking and looking at my phone hoping Marc will call back. I’m down half the bottle of Jack now and can feel the full affects it has on me more so since I’ve not eaten. The movie is over and re-running again. I don’t bother to change the channel. I feel myself slip into a half sleep right there on the couch. I don’t remember fully passing out but when I wake up the next morning I let out soft. Spiritually, such an experience wouldhelp me become a good, submissive woman ready to serve my man for life.To be such a sissy, I would wear a gaff that would hide my shamefulparts. But, to signify my spiritual submission and preparation, this gaffwould need to be blessed by a man first. Normally, sissies like me ask ablack, muscular stud to do the blessing. However, after ten years ofbeing devoted to Achref, my Egyptian stud, I thought it more appropriateto ask him first. But he declined. In his mind, he still wanted topossess me as a "man", as a submissive bottom. I felt sad after hisrefusal, yet I was determined to go ahead with my plan. Achref had afriend, Dorian, a sexy, strong, Algerian bodybuilder who would sometimeslet me worship his beauty. I admired Dorian greatly, also because hismuscle mass was always proportionate, never excessive. One day, I calledhim to ask if he was willing to bless my gaff. When he answered yes, Ifelt on top of the world. My feminine dream was.
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